-My Life On Campus

Must Read: My Life On Campus… Part 38

If You Missed The Part 37, Read It Here

Then I realized the devil had signed up as my life coach. I found it difficult to breath with my nose so I opened my mouth to breath freely. I was breathing heavily.
Kofo shifted closer to me. “Banji, what happened again? Who called?”
“Our Landlord.” I muttered with tears dribbling down my cheeks.
“What did he say? What happened to your mum? Talk to me.” She curiously asked.
“My mum just experienced an episode of syncope.”
“Episode of syncope? Is that a movie? Or what?” She asked, confused.
A part of me laughed while the other halve was still bitter. “It means, she just fainted.” I explained.
She covered her mouth with her hands, shocked and later said, “Oh my God! What are we going to do now?”
I checked the time, it read 7:30 P.M. I laid flat on the bed and sighed. “She has been rushed to the hospital. I’ll go check her tomorrow.”
“You’ll have to travel home? Ha! That’s pretty far.” She said, concerned.
“Yes, I have no choice. She is all I got now.” I said, with a saturated eyes.
“Then, I will go with you.” She confidently uttered.
I was dumbfounded by her response, stunned by her kind gesture and amazed at her love for me. If I lose you, it’s my fault and I deserve to be punished, I almost said.
“Are you serious?” I asked, still surprised.
She nodded in affirmation and said, “Yes, I’m.”
I felt so loved. I swiftly wiped out my tears with my shirt to appreciate her. I stared at her, she gazed back at me. I smiled, she smiled too.
“Tell me your story.” I said.
“Banji, please I don’t want to reopen my wound.” She pleaded.
I was adamant, I insisted. “Tell me. If the wound opens, I gat a first aid box here to treat it.” I jokingly said. “Tell me, I want to know.”
“Ok. Fine.”
After all was said, I understood what Kofo meant by wound. It actually wasn’t a wound but a fracture, a complicated one at that. I could imagine it all:
Kofo, being the baby of the house out of four siblings, had the whole affection poured on her like rain. She was the Josephine of her house; just that she had no multicolored robe like Joseph and she rarely dreams, far from even interpreting one.
She wasn’t born with a silver spoon nor a wooden spoon, in fact, she had no spoon in her mouth. Kofo was from a comfortable average family. Her father, a sailor, who spend most of his days on the sea and one out of ten of it at home with his family.
“My dad is away so he won’t make it to the P.T.A meeting, Sir.” Kofo said to her teacher, her SS1 teacher.
“Your mum?” The teacher asked.
“She’s busy too.”
Kofo’s mother was a banker. She worked from dawn to dusk everyday, sparing Saturday for her laundries and Sunday for God and her kids.
The bad would be bad and the good would be good, was the story among Kofo and her siblings: Jide, Dare and Bisi.
Jide was the first-born and a pain in the butt of his parents. He had been admitted into three different universities at different years but was withdrawn for academic incompetence twice and misconduct, the last. He wasn’t ready to learn or improve; he succeeded in visiting three different campuses like a musician on campus tour; in, this minute and out, the next.
After lots of frustration by his parents, he decided to increase the heat of his defiance by indulging in smoking, drinking and womanizing. He did all that in secret though because he mustn’t be caught by Kofo, who will definitely shu-shu to their parents.
Unlike some girls, Kofo couldn’t spell condom correctly as an SS1 student, let alone have the knowledge of its use.
“Kofo!” Jide called, stretching some money to her. “Go to Clement’s shop, tell him I said he should give you fighting gloves.”
“Bro, you wanna fight? With who?” Kofo nosily asked.
“Get out of here and do as I asked you.” Jide shouted at her.
She rushed out of the house to get fighting gloves and before she returned, Jide had sneaked his fighting mate into his room, but the person happened to be a lady; fighting temptation with the help of a glove, glove with just one opening and wasn’t meant for the hand, leg or head, wondered where. Kofo heard them laughing out loud like people watching a comedy movie, from his room.
“Bro Jide! I’m back O.” She shouted at Jide’s door.
Jide came out, already breathing very fast like someone that just alighted from a roller-coaster, then collected the glove from Kofo.
“Don’t come close to this door and if Dare returns, tell him to stay back until I come out. I’m busy in the room.”
Kofo inquisitively asked, “Egbon, ki le n se?” which means, ‘Brother, what are you doing?’
He hissed. “Ask Google.” He said and went into his room.
Not quite long, Kofo heard the results of effective punches from Jide’s room.
“Uhhhmmmm… Yeeeeeeeeah! Yeeeeeeaaaah! That’s it! Hit me! Harder baby! Harder!” A female voice protruding out of Jide’s room.
Kofo tiptoed to Jide’s door to peep through the keyhole, but was disappointed because Jide had blocked it with the key.
“At all at all na him bad pass” Kofo muttered.
She wanted to get the whole details of the fighting competition, so as to download it for their parents. She placed her left ear to the door, eavesdropping their conversation; since she couldn’t watch the match live, she chose to listen to the audio commentary.
“This girl, you won’t kill me for my mama. Ooooooouchh! Easy! Hmmmmmm! Yeah! Slooooooowwwwwly.” Jide sounded.
“Ouuuuucccchh! Yes Yes Yes!”
“You’re so sweet girl. In fact when I get to London, I will buy you shoe. Ooooooouch! Yeah! When I get to shoe, I will buy you London.” Jide said.
Kofo chuckled but quickly covered her mouth with her hands.
I laughed as well. Men and their empty promises, Women and their fish-brain not to differentiate a lie and a promise. ‘When I get to London, I will buy you shoe. When I get to shoe, I will buy you London.’ Does that make any sense? Girls, does it? Don’t be fooled, men say lots of gibberish when they are fighting with you, I said to myself as she continued.
There was a dead silence in the room. No voice or sound was heard but still Kofo’s unrelenting ear was gummed to the door like refrigerator magnet. Kofo was shocked and almost fainted when Jide’s door opened suddenly.


One reply on “Must Read: My Life On Campus… Part 38”

Safest husband toasts, or toasts. ‘re brought to you you most likely within the wedding party and are nonetheless required to prove fun, humorous and as effectively as useful of course. best man speech jokes

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.