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-Man Wey Dey Reason

Must Read: Man Wey Dey Reason… Part 51

A story written by Flow1759… If you missed part Fifty, read it HERE!!!

“aaaaaaah!!” I heard a voice screemed. “who pour me that water, aaaaah! Fish water” the voice cried. I recognised the voice as Kate’s. At first i thought of running, but i thought otherwise because that would be ungentleman like.

It instantly dawned on me that i had baptized Kate who was washing her clothes at the backyard with the fish water.

“am sorry, am very sorry” I pleaded as i hurriedly ran towards her. “i never saw you washing” I said taking off my T-shirt.

The fish water i poured on her mostly fell on her a”ss, because she bent down facing her a”ss towards the direction the water came from.

“don’t you have eyes? Are you blind?” she angrily spoke. “yes I am” I couldn’t tell when my mouth altered that. “atleast not blind enough to know that this isn’t the right place to throw dirty water” She said trying to rub off some particles from the fish water that stuck to her b’ombshot with her hand. “don’t worry lemme use my shirt to clean it” I offered.

I thought she would say no. She didn’t.

As i used my T-shirt to rub off the particles on her b’ombshot, my dickson arose.

What i was supposed to rub off within seconds took me ages.

The positioning was as if i was giving it to her from behind. Whoever passes would conclude that was what i was doing. But how would i had found nowhere convenient enough but outside? Even if we were dogs.

“are you not through?” She asked. “almost” I replied. “don’t worry lemme go take my bath and change my clothes” She said wanting to leave. I held her back saying, “there is this particle that refuse going out, lemme rub it off”. Mehn! The electricity her soft a”ss sent made me almost lose grip of the shirt i used to stroke her a”ss.

As i was almost through, i heard, “Flow welldone oh” Bigie said from behind. It seemed he never saw but just heard everything that transpired.

Both “video” and “audio” of what transpired read the same meaning. But if the video is zoomed in, it would read that what Bigie thought i was doing was’nt what i was actually doing. That we were having s”ex outside in broad daylight was what the audio read.

“Bigie no be wetin you dey think oh, i just dey clean her nyash for her” I replied Bigie.

“because you don become her Toilet paper wey dey clean s’hit comot for her nyash abi?” Bigie giggled.

I turned to see Kate hissed, eyeballed me and left. Rolling her fish water a”ss as she catwalked.

Next day after work.

“guys make we enter Ilya du Neked wire na, e don tay oh” Man suggested. “no wahala, make we go so i go see weda if i drink pammy my body go make sense, because e get as my body dey do me, e be like say i no well” Brainbox said.

We got to the joint to meet Bigie. “Baba you are so made in Jambraha” “may ur uku I uku never run of holy water” “even if holy water become the river Niger in your uku I uku, may it satisfy your okpeke, so that ur first son will never resemble ur landlord, to avoid to kowaciate super story” I vibrated as my golden falangis was shinning my karid brothers.

Lucky enough, the Chiefo of Ilya du Neked wire was present.

Chiefo is what Karid entities call their leader or head.

Karid entities are the Kegite community in a particular area. You don’t expect me to define a Kegite community na!

There is what is called vibration in Swahili in Kegite. The Chiefo vibrated more in Swahili. I partially understood his vibration. Albeit immediately he started addressing his members, we that weren’t members of that Ilya moved our tables a distance from them. But i could still hear what he was saying from where i sat.

From the little i understood, he was informing the entities that there would be a Libration soon. He also warned against Aka azu Libration.

Libration is a ceremony to introduce new members to the club.

Aka azu in Ibo language means Back of the hand literally. Back of the hand in the real sense means a thing that is done illegally.

So what the Chiefo actually warned against was Illegal Libration.

Why i so Loved Kegite club was because the vibration could be spicened up with our Native languages. For instance, what an Ibo Vibrater would call uku I uku, a Yoruba Vibrater would call it Ese I Ese. And what an Ibo Vibrater would call Kowaciate, that is Kowa+ciate, and Kowa means to “Talk about” in English, a Yoruba Vibrater would call it Sorociate. But no matter the geographical Vibration, the lingua franca still remains English Vibration.

As we continued drinking Holy water, Man vibrated in Hausa drawing attention to our Table.

I must confess, as Man vibrated in Hausa it sounded as if he was speaking in tongues. Brainbox stared in astonishment, because he was a non-entity in the presence of entities.

We had drank about 3litres each for the 3hours we spent there. But i still needed one for road, so i ordered for one.

As we walked home, Man continued Vibrating in Hausa to God knows who.

I was seeing “things”.

I was seeing so many spiritual things as i lagged behind.

My eyes saw everywhere as a road. Everywhere was a road to walk on.

My eyes met with this beautiful pedestrian way by my left. The pedestrian way looked transparent and fine.

“Nigeria don dey better oh, see as government do road wey people go dey waka, see as e fine well well” I said to myself.

“see my guys dey waka for where motor dey pass, them no know say motor fit jam them, abeg me i go waka for dis fine place wey Government do for us to waka” I said to myself and i strayed to the beautiful Pedestrain way walking majestically.

“gboooooooooodooom!!” I landed into a mighty gutter full of water.

To Be Continued…

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